Going South For The Winter
by Ohfortheloveofpete
Summary: Four kids move to South Park and band together to face great evil. Loosely based on South Park: The Stick Of Truth though it also contains elements from the show itself as well as the movie.
1. Chapter 1: Going Down To South Park

_Greetings! Today I will be writing a story about South Park...the most offensive cartoon in the world! At least in my opinion, anyhow. I suppose it might be contested a bit by Family Guy and Beavis and Butthead. Trey Parker and Matt Stone really came up with something, didn't they?_

 _Of course, having said that, I'm probably not going to make this fanfic as offensive as the show itself. Sure, my father loves it...but of course my mother hates it. I guess I'm going to try to find a middle ground. I wouldn't want this fanfic to be deleted because it was too inappropriate. I'm not the type of person who wants to head to , thank you. Those types of fanfic are not for me...though I am legally an adult._

 _And yes, this fanfic is inspired by the Stick Of Truth...so a lot of elements from that game will be there, such as our protagonist having special powers. Again, it won't be as offensive as the actual thing...though I think you'll still find it funny. Writing comedy is what I do and enjoy best. It's part of the reason I wanted to write this fanfic...well, that, and I'm a South Park fan._

 _Still, I'm going to try to make this fanfic original even if a lot of elements from the show are still there. I hope you enjoy._

 **Chapter 1: Going Down To South Park**

"Here we are!" exclaimed a man in his 30s.

"Finally..." answered the voice of a young boy. It had been some trip getting to Colorado. It felt like hours since he had left his old house.

Not only that, but he was starting to feel cold. Did someone forget to turn on the air conditioning?

Who was this young boy, you ask? His name was Daniel. His parents had decided to move to South Park, a mountain town where the adults acted like children and the children acted like adults.

According to him, there were among other things, friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation (except for Eric Cartman), ample parking day and night, and last but not least, people spouting "Howdy, neighbor!" At least that was what the man with the guitar said. Speaking of which, he was outside playing some rather catchy songs. Maybe he could teach him some songs sometime.

Sure enough. someone did in fact shout such a thing. He could see his parents' logic. Still, he wondered if there was a reason for his parents moving to a quiet mountain town like this instead of the city that he used to live in. He had heard some rather interesting rumors involving South Park.

The only downside was how cold the town was. Of course, it was a mountain town so snow and hail could be expected. But he could get around that by wearing a coat. In this case, he was wearing an eskimo outfit. He thought that it suited him even though he technically was not an Eskimo...nor did he really look one other than his coat.

However, he had decided to remain unhooded.

He had short red hair, was about ten years old, and was Caucasian. He also had blue eyes.

Immediately, he entered his new home along with his parents. Personally he just wanted to get on his laptop so that he could chat on Facebook. He happened to have quite a few Facebook friends.

In fact, he just had a new friend request.

Quickly, he got settled in.

Curious, he decided to look outside. As it turned out, there were other people moving in to South Park as well. There were three moving trucks parked outside.

Personally he wondered if he should try meeting them.

Sure enough, his parents wanted him to do just that. Go outside and meet some friends.

"Why don't you make some friends?" inquired his mother.

"Go out there and meet some kids your age, why don't you?" asked his father. He had better go home before night falls or he would be grounded. And for some strange reason they could find him regardless of where he went...even if he was in the middle of nowhere.

Daniel nodded. It might be a good idea to get to meet new people...though personally he would rather simply stick to Facebook for the matter. How many friends did he have on Facebook, anyway?

He had last count.

Immediately, he went outside so that he could go make some friends.

Outside, he noticed that there were some moving vans down the block. Apparently he wasn't the only person who was moving to South Park.

Sure enough, there was a girl about his age moving in.

From what her parents had said out loud, her name was Angela. She had blonde hair, her eyes were white, she was dressed in a white coat with a yellow scarf.

For some strange reason wherever she walked, flowers appeared to sprout out of the ground...even though it was in the middle of the winter. It was rather unusual.

Taking a closer look, he noticed that another boy was moving in. Judging from his head that for some reason split apart whenever he was talking (which stranger still did not result in him dying), he was Canadian. He still didn't understand why their heads split apart like that and why their eyes were so beady.

Suddenly, the Canadian let out a fart.

Perhaps he was a fan of Terrence and Phillip. Of course, it would probably be hard to find a Canadian that WASN'T a fan of Terrence and Phillip.

Unsurprisingly, his parents happened to be Canadian as well. Like him, they happened to have rather strange heads that resembled Pacman.

"Do you have to always fart in public, Samuel?" asked his father. If he kept it up, he was going to stink up the whole house.

"But it's fun!" exclaimed Samuel. Terrence and Phillip had taught him never to fart in moderation.

Of course, a lot of Americans didn't like Terrence and Phillip. Maybe he would have trouble fitting into South Park.

"If you say so..." answered the man. He had in fact decided to move his son here because he kept on annoying other people with his farting. Not all people were as big fans of Terrence and Phillip as he was.

The last person to move in appeared to be awfully rich, to say the very least.

Sure enough, she appeared to be living inside a mansion with her parents.

Her name was Phoebe.

Immediately, she moved in with them.

Shrugging, Daniel decided to explore town a bit more. So far there didn't seem to be anything peculiar.

At that very moment, he noticed a boy around the same age as him. He was wearing a blue hat and was dressed in brown.

Quickly, he decided to talk to him.

"Hello?" asked Daniel.

"Hey..." answered Stan.

Apparently, he was waiting for something.. Well, obviously he was waiting for the bus...but he was waiting for somebody too.

"Who are you waiting for?" inquired Daniel.

"It's my friend, Kyle..." stated Stan. Usually he would show up whenever they were waiting for a bus.

Sure enough, Kyle showed up.

For some strange reason, Daniel noticed that the characters seemed to hop from place to place rather than just plain walk. It was kind of weird...but this was apparently how all the citizens in South Park walked. Maybe he should try it too...though admittedly it likely would take some time getting used to.

Unfortunately for Kyle, his baby brother Ike had decided to follow him to school...again. Why couldn't he take the kindergarten bus?

For some strange reason, his head resembled that of a football. Maybe it was because he was Canadian? Also, he could split his head in two without dying. In fact, that happened whenever he talked.

As such, he decided to make the best of the situation.

"Ready, Ike? Kick the baby!" exclaimed Kyle gleefully.

Ike looked at his older brother Kyle. Technically, they weren't actually related...but they were brothers regardless.

Unsurprisingly, Ike was not looking forward to that...even if the ground in question was covered in snow and was therefore soft.

"Don't kick the baby!" bellowed Ike. Just because his head looked like a football didn't mean that he SHOULD be used as a football.

Unfortunately for Ike, his brother did not listen. In fact, he NEVER listened.

"Kick the baby!" screamed Kyle.

Immediately, Ike was sent flying.

Luckily, he landed in the snow. It would be a lot more painful if he landed in concrete.

Daniel had to...question Kyle's moral ethics.

Still, as he was about to find out, he was a saint compared to one of his so-called "friends".

At that very moment, Eric Cartman showed up. For some strange reason, despite him being a horrible kid,

"Who's the chubby kid?" asked Daniel.

Suddenly, Eric Cartman punched him in the face.

He then followed by kicking him in the shin, causing him to cry.

"Yeah! Run home to mother, you big baby!" exclaimed Cartman.

Daniel decided to do so.

Naturally, Stan and Kyle decided to call him out on it.

"Why do you always beat up our friends?" asked Stan. This was far from the first time that it had happened. Of course, his girlfriend Wendy had once beaten up him.

"Nobody likes them!" exclaimed Cartman.

Daniel began to wonder what exactly was Eric Cartman's problem. For some strange reason something about him seemed...evil.

And to think that he had only known him for a few minutes too.

Shrugging, he decided to go back home. Hopefully his injuries weren't too severe...he wouldn't want to have to go the hospital on his first day of moving.

Sure enough, his parents decided to ask him about how he was doing make friends...and why exactly was he bruised and battered. They wouldn't be surprised if Daniel had bled a bit across the snow.

"What happened?" asked his mother.

"A mean, fat kid beat me up..." answered Daniel. He sure hoped that not all kids at South Park were like that. There was something...off about that boy.

"I heard that!" exclaimed Eric Cartman from a distance.

lDaniel gulped. How big were Cartman's ears? Perhaps it would be best to check if Cartman was around before he said anything. He could be spying on him.

Daniel's parents wondered if they should have a talk with Eric Cartman's mother.

Sighing, he decided to go to bed. Hopefully things would go better for him from here. Why was he even friends with those two boys? At least Stan and Kyle seemed friendly enough. Perhaps he should hang out with them sometime.

Meanwhile, the rich girl decided to check out her new estate. She wondered why her parents had decided to move her here. They said that they would gain tax benefits from their former home or something like that.

She didn't seem to recall them ever selling real estate though.

"Are you enjoying your new home, Phoebe?" asked her mother.

"Yes, mother." nodded Phoebe. It certainly was a nice place...even if it was rather chilly. She was under the impression that her parents would rather go somewhere warmer than somewhere colder, but what did they know?

"Good! Remember to act like a lady...you're privileged to be part of our family line so make sure to act the part, alright?" asked Phoebe's mother.

"Alright..." nodded Phoebe.

Immediately, she went into her room.

Shortly afterwards, she looked at her fireman calendar. For some strange reason, none of the firemen on the calendar were wearing shirts. Maybe they were too sexy for them. She certainly thought so.

Quickly, she began to drool.

Hopefully there would be attractive guys in South Park.

Unfortunately, her parents had told her to stop flirting with every male she sees...apparently they thought she should restrain herself so that she didn't get slapped with a restraining order.

Besides, that was not how a "proper" lady should behave...or at least, that what was what they said. Why did the rich have to have such high standards? Sometimes she wished that she wasn't part of that family.

What a disappointment.

But perhaps it was best to listen to her parents. They did want her best wishes after all.

On the other hand, South Park Elementary might be a good place to find boys. She would just have to meet them after school, after all.

However, there was something that she wanted to keep secret.

Something that was rather strange.

 _Well, that was the first chapter of my fanfic. As you can see I'm not going to introduce just one OC...I'm going to be introducing four...I figured that would be appropriate since there are four boys as main protagonists...I'm going for an equal gender ensemble, though. In the next chapter, I'll be featuring Mr. Garrison...and the evil Mr. Hat._


	2. Chapter 2: Off To School

_In this chapter, our protagonists are heading off to their new school. Of course, their teacher will be Mr. Garrison. Hopefully they won't have to face the wrath of Mr. Hat. You probably know how dangerous that he can be._

 _In addition, you're also going to meet the fanfic's main antagonist...you're probably not going to be surprised who it is._

 **Chapter 2: Off To School**

After getting used to their new home, it was time for South Park's newest kids to go to school. It quickly became apparent how cranky their bus driver was. Did she not get enough sleep? She was rather scary.

It would probably be best for them not to anger her. She might not be mentally stable.

Fortunately, the bus arrived at South Park without any problems.

As they did so, Cartman, Stan, Kyle sang a song about how great South Park was. Kenny simply said something that was absolutely horrid. It was times like that when people were glad that he wore a parka to muffle his speech.

As it turned out, their teacher was going to be Mr. Garrison. It seemed like years since Cartman, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny had first entered his classroom.

Of course, for Daniel, Angela, Samuel, and Phoebe, THIS was the first time that they were entering his classroom.

As usual, he was holding onto Mr. Hat, a rather deranged puppet who could manipulate Mr. Garrison into joining the KKK and murdering celebrities. Perhaps Mr. Garrison should put him away in a closet somewhere.

"Good morning, class. Today we shall be welcoming four students to the classroom. Their names are Daniel, Angela, Samuel, and Phoebe. Please welcome them to the classroom...or throw stuff at them. I don't care." stated Mr. Garrison.

Something told Daniel and Angela that Mr. Garrison wasn't necessarily the best teacher in the world.

"Today we're going to be learning about spelling...can anyone spell idiot? Because you're an idiot if you can't spell it..." said the teacher.

Daniel wondered if his fourth grade class was going to be miserable.

"What's that, Mr. Hat? You're saying that the students are all going to grow up to be failures and we shouldn't even bother teaching them? Now that's rather extreme..." noted Mr. Garrison.

On the lighter side, it appeared that Mr. Garrison was not nearly as sadistic as the puppet on his hand...wait, why was he talking to a hand puppet?

Now that he thought of it, he thought that he saw it blinking once or twice. It was a very strange puppet...not to mention creepy. Did it have mind control over Mr. Garrison or something?

"Is Mr. Garrison always like that?" asked Daniel.

"He's been talking to that puppet ever since the first day of school...I wonder if he had it ever since he was a child..." questioned Stan. Personally he was worried that Mr. Hat was driving him to commit murder. One time they had almost killed a celebrity that was visiting South Park.

"Maybe he's lonely?" questioned Kyle. Mr. Garrison had been discriminated before due to the fact that he was gay.

Currently, Mr. Hat was drawing "DEATH" on the chalkboard along with the other words that the students had to review.

Angela gasped in alarm.

"What? You drew death on the chalkboard? Why would you do that, Mr. Hat?" questioned Mr. Garrison.

Quickly, he erased the offensive word off the chalkboard.

"Mr. Garrison, remind me to shoot you while you're sleeping!" bellowed Mr. Hat.

"Mr. Hat, do I have to take you back to the asylum?" asked the teacher.

"You can do that! I'll bust every single inmate out! It will be fantastic!" exclaimed the puppet.

Daniel shivered at the thought of South Park being full of lunatics...even more so than it was now.

"That's it for today. Class dismissed!" exclaimed Mr. Garrison.

Immediately, the students left the classroom. It was time to go back home.

"What is up with that puppet?" thought Daniel.

Well, at least he seemed to be doing well in school so far. Then again, it was only the first day.

Once again, he used the school bus. This time, it was to get home.

Veronica Crabtree was as cranky as ever, it seemed. Did she not like her job? He wondered if Mr. Garrison liked his job. Was his puppet somehow employed too?

Meanwhile, Phoebe was trying to resist the urge to flirt with boys like her parents had asked from her. Apparently, it wasn't lady-like.

Perhaps she had grown up in the wrong family.

This was getting to be more difficult since there was a rather lecherous boy in the same classroom as her that seemed to want to pick up some girls. It was making it rather tempting.

However, something happened as she left school.

As she inevitably began to walk back home, she saw a vision.

As it turned out, there was a drunk driver on the road...and he crashed directly into a tree.

Shortly afterward, the car exploded. She sure hoped that he had car insurance...and that his family had life insurance.

For some strange reason, not long after she was born, she gained the ability to see death. It was rather disturbing. Fortunately, people did not die very often back where she came from...though she wondered if there were many deaths in South Park. The town seemed to be hiding something.

Sure enough, she witnessed the exact same thing happen outside of her head. Apparently, he shouldn't have been drinking and driving.

She had decided to keep her ability secret from the rest of South Park, since they figured that she would probably be going crazy if she told them about it.

Meanwhile, Samuel was busy watching Terrence and Phillip. Though it was basically the same gag every single episode, he never got tired of watching it. No wonder it was so popular in Canada.

Of course, he wasn't technically living in Canada anymore. Nowadays he was living in Colorado.

"Hey Terrence! Guess what?" asked Phillip.

"What?" inquired Terrence. He already knew what was going to happen.

"I'm going to fart!" exclaimed the man in a teal shirt.

Sure enough, Phillip farted.

Terrence simply laughed.

At that very moment, Scott the Dick showed up. As usual, he was rather cranky.

"Are you farting in each other's faces again? That's simply disgusting! I hope you get cancer!" bellowed Scott.

"Hey, Scott!" asked Terrence.

"What?" inquired Scott.

Terrence farted in Scott's face. He recoiled in disgust.

"I hate you so much! One of these days you're going to regret farting on me!" bellowed the most hated man in Canada.

Terrence and Phillip ignored him, and continued farting in each other's faces. It was simply irresistible to them.

Scott the Dick then left their house, slamming the door as he did so.

Samuel wondered why Scott the Dick hated Terrence and Phillip so much. He never recalled them doing anything to him...except maybe fart in his face.

Everyone else in Canada seemed to love Terrence and Phillip. In fact, farting so much was what made them so popular in the first place.

Well, now he was going to eat some baked beans. He heard that those made him fart.

He was looking forward to that.

 _Meanwhile at a dark, evil castle..._

Unbeknownst to Daniel, Angela, Samuel, and Phoebe, they were secretly being monitored. Inside her castle, a woman of pure malevolence sat on her throne, which was dripping with blood and was made out of skulls. Inside the throne room was a portrait of herself. Next to the throne were two candles that were rather eerily lit.

Currently, she was drinking a martini...a martini that was made out of children's tears. Since children hated her, making martinis out of that wasn't difficult at all.

When she was finished with her martini, she requested another one.

"I need another martini!" ordered Barbara Streisand.

"Yes, my mistress!" exclaimed one of the cultists. Despite her wickedness, there were a few people that wanted her autograph. Those few formed some of her evil minions, the Cult Of Streisand. When one got her autograph, they inevitably found themselves being enslaved by Streisand...but a few people thought it was worth it.

The cultist came back with another martini a few minutes later.

"Dismissed." stated Barbara Streisand.

Immediately, the cultist left so that he could head back into the courtyard and worship Barbara Streisand. There was a statue directly outside so that they could all marvel in her evil glory.

Outside the castle, lightning was flashing. It never seemed to be sunny around the castle. Barbara Streisand's demonic minions were currently patrolling the castle, ready to defend it from intruders if the time arose.

Time and time again, people had marched to her castle in a futile attempt to stop her. Whether it was because they were stupid or arrogant, she wasn't quite sure. Perhaps it was a mixture of both. Either way, they had all ended up dead and their bodies inside her castle moat.

As it turned out, the dreaded sorceress Barbara Streisand had heard a report that four kids were going to defeat her, in particular Angela, who in contrast to her was utterly lacking in darkness inside her soul.

And of course, she was going to have none of that. She had ruled much of the world too long to let some meddling kids overthrow her. Naturally, nobody ruled forever, she would admit that, but she was going to stretch it out as long as she could. At the rate she was going she was going to rule for centuries or even millennia.

Throughout the years, Barbara Streisand had oppressed many with her horrible singing and had used ancient magics to terrorize innocents. All that attempted to stop her had been obliterated and tortured.

Unsurprisingly, when they heard a prophecy stating that she would be defeated, people were absolutely ecstatic. Every now and then she could hear them cheering outside. Perhaps she should send her minions to straighten things out.

But she believed the prophecy to be false and that she had nothing to worry about. How could four kids defeat her?

"Four kids defeating me? Really? I've taken on adults and I've come out without a scratch..." stated Barbara Streisand. Her magic was simply too powerful. Of course, the prophecy had inspired people to take arms against her as of late, but she wasn't too worried. She could crush their hope if things got too out of hand.

Nonetheless, she had decided to monitor those that had been mentioned in the prophecy. She might want to take action if they suddenly became fighters. Some of the children in South Park were wizards. Others were archers. Some were knights. Some were paladins. Some were even princesses. It seemed only a matter of time before those children decided to choose classes as well.

Fortunately, it appeared that the students would rather fight with each other than against her. Unfortunately for Eric Cartman, he had chosen to insult Kyle regarding him being a Jew...and he was the leader of a group of elves...in contrast to Eric who was the leader of a group of humans.

Inevitably, the two of them declared war on each other due to their leaders not getting along, and they both began to fight each other.

Barbara Streisand found it rather satisfying to watch...as long as they kept fighting each other...they would ignore her completely and she would be free to do whatever she wished...even wipe them both out if she needed to.

So far, it looked like things were going well for her.

"Those fools have no idea who their true enemy is..." thought Barbara Streisand. Barbara Streisand was in fact a bigger threat to both of their kingdoms, but neither of them realized it.

"Life is good...or evil." stated Barbara Streisand, drinking a martini.

Still, there was one thing that interested her. Apparently, one of the four had the ability to predict death. Perhaps it would be best to keep an eye on her.

It was a rather peculiar ability.

If she learned how to use that ability, perhaps she could use it to prevent her from destroying those that she perceived as her enemies.

She would have to deal with her if she started using the ability to her advantage.

For now, she would continue to monitor South Park. It might be a good place to make a new movie...

...a horror movie.

 _Surprised? The main antagonist of the fanfic is Barbara Streisand! I figured it would be appropriate...you probably know that Matt Stone and Trey Parker aren't friends with her._

 _Strangely enough I haven't even heard of Barbara Streisand until I heard about the episode that they made featuring Barbara Streisand...I figured she would be the perfect character for the title...and yes, I didn't simply go for a villainous OC this time like I did in my Ninja Tail fanfic..._

 _In the next chapter, Phoebe's going to learn how to use her powers to save people...can you guess who she's going to test it out on? And of course, Barbara Streisand will take action._


	3. Chapter 3: I See Dead People

_In this chapter, Phoebe's going to learn how to use her powers to her advantage. This is going to be a boon for a certain canon character...however, Barbara Streisand is quickly going to notice. She likes spying on people, as you probably know already._

 _She's also going to cast a spell that is bad news for Phoebe and her friends...will they be able to survive?_

 **Chapter 3: I See Dead People**

As Phoebe went outside to get some fresh air (and possibly flirt with boys despite her parents' wishes), she noticed four boys hanging out on the sidewalk. Perhaps she should go visit them?

Those boys were of course Cartman, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny, who were up to their natural antics. Phoebe noticed that for some strange reason the kids in South Park acted like adults while the adults in South Park acted as children.

To demonstrate, she just had to look at Randy Marsh interacting with his son Stan. Apparently his own son was smarter than him. Of course, that might change when HE becomes an adult...though she heard that nobody ever seemed to grow up in South Park regardless of how long their show stayed on-air.

Unfortunately for Kenny, Cartman was daring him to do something that was rather dangerous...and illegal. And it was mainly to pass the time as they waited for

"Hey, Kenny! I'll give you ten bucks if you jaywalk down the street!" exclaimed Eric Cartman.

Kenny nodded, and began to jaywalk down the street, ignoring the traffic completely. In fact, he closed his eyes.

The results were what you might expect. It was not something that children should see, that was for sure. Then again, Stan, Kyle, and Cartman weren't like most children.

Sure enough, before it actually happened, Phoebe witnessed a car run over Kenny. It was Stan's grandpa, Marvin Marsh who was driving the vehicle. Oddly enough there was another resident in South Park who was named Marvin...only he was young and he was always hungry.

"Get off the road, you rascal!" bellowed Grandpa Marsh as he ran over Kenny.

It happened for real a few seconds later.

Stan and Kyle were none too pleased with Cartman for killing Kenny. They immediately glared at Cartman for making Kenny go on a dare that dangerous.

"What? Nobody cares about the poor." stated Cartman. He knew HE didn't.

"Oh my god, you killed Kenny!" exclaimed Stan.

"You fat bastard!" bellowed Kyle.

"Don't call me fat, you filthy Jew!" shouted Cartman.

This was noticed by Daniel and Angela as well.

"Good lord!" exclaimed Daniel. His skin was as white as snow after witnessing such a bloody demise.

"How often do people die in this town?" asked Angela. She felt like she was going to be sick.

"Well, that was rather depressing." stated Phoebe. Was Kenny really that desperate for money? Perhaps that was what life was like living on the OTHER side of things. Perhaps she shouldn't take wealth for granted.

Well, she decided that she should go get a soda. Her fridge was always loaded.

She opened the fridge and picked out a can of delicious cherry soda.

Afterwards, she decided to look out the window. It was a rather nice day today...aside from what happened to unfortunate Kenny.

However, when she went to look outside the window, she immediately spat out the soda in response.

There was Kenny, exiting his house. He seemed to have a headache, but other than that he seemed perfectly healthy. It was as if he had never been run over by a car in the first place.

Was she simply imagining things? She could have sworn she saw Kenny being run over and she heard Kyle and Stan yelling at Cartman a few minutes ago.

It was very weird.

Not only that, but when Daniel and Angela spotted him, they acted like they hadn't witnessed him dying at all. Why didn't they remember him dying? Had it been wiped completely from their brains?

Perhaps she should pay Kenny a visit. She was getting rather curious about him.

Immediately, she opened her door and walked over to his house.

She then proceeded to knock on his door.

Kenny opened the door a few seconds later.

"Hello?" asked Kenny in his muffled voice.

"Hey there, Kenny. Remember me from school?" inquired Phoebe.

Kenny nodded. Wasn't she one of the new students? He hadn't really seen her around South Park before.

"Could I visit you for just a few minutes?" asked the girl. She was curious to see if Kenny was going to die again.

"OK!" exclaimed Kenny. He loved being in the company of pretty girls.

As he walked up the stairs, Phoebe decided to see if Kenny was going to die again. It wouldn't hurt to check.

Apparently, he was. Somebody had carelessly left a banana peel at the top of the stairs.

Phoebe imagined him slipping over the banana peel, falling down the stairs and him hitting his head, giving him a lethal head concussion that killed him instantly.

However, Phoebe then thought of something. What if she were to remove the banana peel so that Kenny DIDN'T end up getting a fatal head concussion?

She decided to give it a shot.

Sure enough, Kenny showed up, waiting to walk down the stairs. He was humming to himself.

Surprisingly, he walked down the stairs without falling down them, unlike what Phoebe had witnessed in her vision.

As he did so, he began to feel a bit strange. He could have sworn that he was going to die right then and there.

But he decided that maybe he was just imagining things.

This made Phoebe wonder if she could actually use her powers to PREVENT death instead of simply sitting back and watching it. In other words, she could use her powers to actually change the future.

"Hmm..." thought Phoebe. Perhaps she should hang out with Kenny a bit more. He always seems to be in mortal peril from what she knew about him. She might even be able to enhance her abilities.

She decided to follow him as he left home. Something told her that his life might be in danger again.

Sure enough, she spotted something alarming with her powers.

Apparently, there was a herd of cattle heading right this way. Someone should have kept an eye on the cow pen.

And of course, they were heading straight towards Kenny.

"Um, you might want to remain indoors for a few minutes..." stated Phoebe.

"Huh?" asked Kenny.

Shrugging, he decided to listen to Phoebe. He could wait a bit longer to go outside.

It was lucky that they went inside, as the cow herd passed directly by them.

"Whoa!" exclaimed the boy. It was a good thing that Phoebe spotted the herd when she did. Otherwise he would be splattered all over the sidewalk.

Hopefully the cattle rustlers can take them back where they belonged.

Strangely enough he got the feeling that he was going to be run over by that cow herd and die like usual. But not today.

Again, he felt funky.

The cow herd was noticed by Samuel as well.

"I heard that cows fart all the time...how about that!" exclaimed Samuel.

Immediately, he decided to let out a fart so that he could imitate them.

Fortunately, the cow herd missed him completely as well.

Afterwards, Phoebe decided to look around to see if Cartman was going to make Kenny go on another dangerous dare. Some of them were simply disgusting...but others could be potentially fatal.

Sure enough, Cartman was planning to make Kenny do the latter.

"Hey, Kenny! I dare you to jump off that building over there! I'll give you ten bucks!" exclaimed Cartman. Ironically, this was rather similar to the dare that he had given him earlier.

Phoebe quickly noted that it was a rather tall building. It would probably be best for Kenny NOT to jump off it.

Sure enough, she witnessed Kenny McCormick falling off the building and ending up becoming a bloodstain on the floor. At least his parka was still intact. It looked rather comfortable.

Immediately, she knew exactly what to do.

"I'll give you twenty bucks if you DON'T do that." stated Phoebe.

Kenny McCormick immediately decided that he should not jump off the building.

"Aww!" exclaimed Cartman. Unfortunately, it appeared that someone had more money than he did.

Why did Phoebe have to be filthy rich? Personally he thought that HE should be the rich one...even if his mother already spoiled him. Unfortunately, she had no idea how to raise Cartman with a father figure absent from his life.

Well, it looked like he wouldn't be able to dare Kenny to do dangerous things while she was around. It was just his luck.

Kenny happily accepted the twenty dollars that he had essentially gotten for free. Phoebe was a rather nice girl...especially considering that she lived at the heights while he lived at the slums.

Of course, Token also lived at the heights and he was rather nice too. Maybe the rich kids at South Park simply weren't cruel...unlike Eric Cartman. He was starting to wonder if he was deliberately getting him killed...or if he simply couldn't say no to money.

Kenny wondered what he was going to spend money on.

He decided to go get some delicious candy. That would be quite satisfying.

Phoebe smiled and went back to her house.

It looked like she was learning to use her powers to prevent people from dying...perhaps there were other people that she could save as well.

Perhaps this was why she was granted powers in the first place.

Now that she was done, she decided to look at pictures of David Hasselhoff...without his shirt on.

"Oh yeah..." stated Phoebe.

 _Elsewhere..._

At the playground, Daniel and Angela were feeling rather nervous.

"Do you get the feeling that something bad is going to happen soon?" asked Daniel.

"Actually, I do." nodded Angela.

"I'm starting to feel worried..." noted the boy.

"Me too..." agreed the girl.

Hopefully it was nothing and that they could sleep at night.

But perhaps it was something big.

 _Meanwhile..._

Unfortunately for Phoebe, she was being watched. Barbara Streisand had a feeling this was going to happen.

"So...she's learning to master her power, is she? Well, she is one of the four that people think that is going to defeat me..." stated Barbara.

Perhaps it was time for her to take action. If she did nothing, then the problem was only going to get worse.

"What should I do?" thought the sorceress.

Curious, she began to flip through her spellbook. Perhaps there was something that she could use to get rid of Phoebe before she actually started fighting her.

"Let's see now..." stated the evil woman.

Suddenly, she found something.

"There we go." said the sorceress.

Among the many, many evil spells in her spellbook, there was a necromancy spell that she could use to summon zombies. Zombies that loved the taste of human flesh.

Best of all, they would be under her control.

"Alright then..." stated the sorceress.

Immediately, she began to cast the spell.

As she was casting, a storm suddenly began to brew in South Park.

People began to wonder what's going on.

"Hey Ned, did you know that it was going to rain today?" asked Jimbo.

"No, sir." stated Ned using his electrolarynx. If he had known that it was going to rain, he would have brought his umbrella.

As the spell reached its completion, zombies began to rise from their graves.

"Brains..." murmured one of the evil zombies.

"They're coming right for us!" bellowed Jimbo. It looked like it was time to get his shotgun. Fortunately, there were no hunting laws against hunting zombies...so it looked like he could shoot them all he wanted.

"Zombies again?" questioned Ned. This wasn't the first time that South Park had been attacked by zombies. And it wasn't even Halloween this time.

Barbara Streisand laughed maniacally. It should be a simple matter of finding Phoebe and having the zombies eat her brains now.

Immediately, she put her spellbook back on her table and went back to her throne.

Of course, South Park did deal with a zombie invasion once before...but she was sure that the zombies would at least be able to kill Phoebe before the townsfolk dealt with it.

Hopefully they would be able to kill many civilians. She would simply love the carnage. The spell would be fun while it lasted...after which the zombies would simply return to their graves.

"I'd like to see South Park deal with the zombie invasion..." stated Barbara Streisand.

 _Surprised? Probably not. It seems natural that Phoebe should use her death-predicting ability on Kenny McCormick. He dies about as much as Scratchy dies on that other show. He might as well as take off his orange parka and put on his red shirt. But wait...Cartman wears a red shirt and HE never dies. How odd._

 _In the next chapter, there's going to be ZOMBIES. Believe it or not, it's just a sample of what Barbara Streisand can do. She is essentially the most powerful sorceress in the world, after all. Fortunately, it appears that she's not going after our protagonists herself...at least not yet. If she did, they would probably wind up dead. She's simply too powerful._

 _So...I'll be seeing you later then._


	4. Chapter 4: Dusk Of The Dead

_In this chapter, South Park is going to be invaded by zombies! And yes, this has happened before. You'd be surprised what can happen at a mountain town like South Park. It was once attacked by Barbara Streisand...since Barbara Streisand is apparently a hated celebrity I decided to make her the villain._

 _I figured I would update my fanfic again since it was getting some attention._

 _I was originally going to include hordes of zombies...but I figured maybe I would start out small instead. Fortunately, Jimbo and Ned already took care of the initial horde of zombies. But due to their ability to infect others it's only a matter of time before they become a horde again._

 **Chapter 4: Dusk Of The Dead**

Phoebe was feeling rather worried. She had predicted that bad things were going to happen in South Park.

She wasn't sure what was going to happen, but it wasn't going to be fun.

She got the feeling that South Park was hiding secrets.

Crazy secrets.

Currently, she was at the school cafeteria. Chef seemed different than all the other adults at South Park.

His food was also pretty good.

However, Phoebe wondered why everyone called him Chef instead of his first name. Apparently, his real name was Jerome Elroy.

She decided to check the newspaper to see if it matched up with her visions.

Apparently, a dead body had been found. He had been eaten by what seemed to be another person.

Was human flesh really that delicious?

She wondered who could have done something so disgusting. She sure hoped that there wasn't a cannibalistic serial killer in the neighborhood, and if there was, they didn't feast on children.

Was it a sign for what was to come?

She wondered.

She decided to hang out with her friends. It would be best if she stayed with them in case that cannibal struck again.

She decided to go visit Eric Cartman.

However, for some strange reason, there seemed to be a castle up ahead.

"Huh?" asked Phoebe.

She decided to investigate.

There was Eric Cartman...but for some strange reason he was dressed as a wizard.

She wondered what was going on. Since when was Cartman capable of using magic?

"Am I dreaming?" asked Phoebe.

Cartman was currently preventing a ginger from crossing the bridge.

"Hey! No gingers allowed!" exclaimed Cartman.

"Aww..." said Gordon.

"Maybe not." answered the girl.

Also present was Kenny, but for some strange reason, he was now a princess.

"You're a princess?" asked Phoebe.

Kenny nodded.

He thought that roleplaying as a princess was fun. Personally he thought that princesses were hot.

"Is this a friend of yours, Princess Kenny?" asked Wizard Cartman.

Kenny nodded.

"Well then, I suppose you can role-play with us then. Just don't be a Jew or we'll never be friends." answered Cartman.

Phoebe rolled her eyes at Cartman's anti-semitism.

"I've seen you hanging out with a Jew a lot of the time..." stated Phoebe.

"You saw nothing!" exclaimed the wizard.

"OK..." answered the girl. Some people were hypocritical.

"So...who do you want to role-play as?" asked Cartman.

"I think I'll be a barbarian...I'll be the bodyguard of Princess Kenny." answered Phoebe. Since Kenny was playing the role of a princess, it seemed appropriate that she would have a bodyguard to keep her safe.

Wouldn't want her to be kidnapped by a dragon. Why did bad things keep happening to Kenny, anyway? On the other hand, he seemed lucky enough to have made some friends and had enough money to go to school, even if he WAS poor.

Kenny noted that Tweek had also chosen to be a barbarian. But it seemed that he didn't wield a weapon.

"The bodyguard of Princess Kenny? Does she even have one of those?" asked Cartman.

"I think that would be a VERY good idea." muffled Kenny.

"Huh? Whatever! You can be a barbarian! Just as long as you're not a Jew!" exclaimed the mage.

"Right, of course not." answered Phoebe.

Phoebe picked up a toy axe and put on a beard. She also put on a viking helmet and some armor.

"Argh!" exclaimed the girl.

"I don't know why you're roleplaying as a guy, but Kenny likes roleplaying as a girl so I won't judge." answered Cartman.

"I wonder if any of our friends would be willing to role-play with us..." questioned Phoebe.

"Some of them are roleplaying with Kyle, unfortunately. They don't know good roleplaying at all!" exclaimed the mage.

"Right..." answered the barbarian.

"By the way, why are you roleplaying with Cartman?" asked Phoebe. He didn't seem like too much fun to be roleplaying with, considering how rude he was. He could be awfully selfish too.

Besides, something told her that boy was evil.

"He said he would give me money if I role-played with him." answered Kenny. Knowing Cartman he would probably cheat at role-playing games, but since he was getting paid he decided to put up with it.

"Right..." answered the girl. She knew how poor Kenny was.

 _Meanwhile..._

Jimbo recalled killing zombies last night, but it seemed like he had managed to kill them all. He thought that it was just a dream. Although, Ned mentioned that he had the same dream.

Fortunately, most of the zombies hadn't made it across the border.

But unfortunately, the zombie uprising was just beginning. Soon there would be more of them.

"Did you hear about what happened to that poor man who was eaten by a cannibal?" asked Jimbo.

"I sure did, Jimbo." answered Ned.

"I sure hope that it was an animal. That way I can shoot it!" exclaimed the man.

"You sure enjoy your hunting, Jimbo." noted Jimbo's hunting partner.

"I sure do! Have you seen all my hunting trophies?" asked Jimbo.

Ned noted that there were enough hunting trophies to decorate the entire wall.

He was starting to wonder if this was becoming an unhealthy obsession for Chef.

Suddenly, he noticed that there was a rabbit outside the window.

"A rabbit? Alright! You know how fast they breed! I can empty all my bullets in my gun and not run out of bunnies!" exclaimed Jimbo.

"Do you really have to kill cute animals?" asked Ned. The PETA were going to kick Jimbo's ass if he kept doing that.

"Hey, if I don't do nothin', the rabbits will take over South Park!" shouted the huntsman. And it wasn't even Easter.

Ned had to admit, Jimbo did have a point. He did wonder if Jimbo was simply looking for an excuse to hunt more animals, however.

Jimbo dashed outside and went to shoot the rabbit.

However, he found that someone had beaten him to the punch.

"Damn it!" exclaimed Jimbo.

Not only that, but they were eating the rabbit...raw.

"Hey! Don't steal my kills!" shouted the hunter. He hated it whenever another hunter did that.

The mysterious person turned around, and Jimbo discovered that they had green flesh.

Not only that, but they seemed to be decomposing.

As it turned out, the rabbit had been eaten by something with an even faster breeding process than it did.

"Aah! It's a zombie!" exclaimed Jimbo.

Jimbo quickly shot the zombie.

"There! Now nobody will interrupt my hunting!" shouted the hunter.

However, he got the feeling that the zombie might not be alone.

Perhaps it would be best if he went to fetch his other weapons.

He certainly had a lot of them, not least because he used to be part of the Vietnam War. How he wished that the United States won.

 _At Kyle's house..._

Daniel noticed that there was an enormous tree growing in Kyle's yard, and he went to investigate.

As it turned out, there was a large treehouse contained inside that tree.

Daniel wondered why Kyle had such an enormous tree.

"Who goes there?" asked Kyle.

"It's me...I'm from your same school." answered Daniel.

"Very well." answered the archer.

Nearby was Stan. Unlike Kyle, he happened to be a knight.

Daniel entered the treehouse.

"Eric Cartman wouldn't let me join in his RPs since I was a jew...so I figured I would start a role-play of my own." explained Kyle.

"I see..." nodded Daniel.

"Since elves have a longer life span as humans, I decided to play as one." said the boy. He decided that he could taunt Cartman that way since he had chosen to play as a human.

"I see..." answered the boy. Perhaps he could play as an elf too.

"So, you want to join an RP? Of course, you'll be enemies with Cartman...but he has a lot of enemies." answered the young boy.

Daniel nodded. Cartman seemed like a total jerk.

"So...what class do you want to be?" asked Kyle.

"I guess I'll be a monk." answered Daniel. Personally he liked the idea of fighting foes with his bare hands instead of relying on a weapon. That way he wouldn't have to worry about disarmed...unless he ended up getting his arms cut off.

Then again, maybe he could simply regenerate them. It seemed that the RPs his friend was doing was loosely based on Dungeons and Dragons.

Kyle nodded.

Daniel wondered if Angela would be interested in joining Kyle.

He got the feeling she wouldn't be interested in helping Cartman.

 _Meanwhile..._

Chef sighed. He got the feeling that there was going to be a zombie outbreak in South Park, again. He saw a zombie outside the window. Fortunately, he had successfully bribed it not to attack him by offering him food.

Luckily, it seemed like Jimbo had already taken care of the initial outbreak. There were bodies all across the border. Even so, he got the feeling that it was only the beginning.

Sometimes, being a chef could come in handy. He could even weaponize food if he was in a fight. At least, that was the case whenever he role-played with the children.

However, this time, it didn't seem to be the work of a mortician being careless.

It seemed like this was the work of dark magic.

Chef wondered who could have done it.

Apparently, it was the work of some sort of evil necromancer.

Chef wondered who it was.

He wasn't quite sure who did it, but he got the feeling that it was because it amused them.

Whoever it was that was responsible, he was going to have to get ready for a fight.

Oh, and if he ever found out who did it, he was going to kick their ass.

He had a frying pan for that specific purpose.

Perhaps the zombie outbreak had something to do with the storm that had occurred last night. The weatherman said that the skies were going to be clear last night, yet a storm appeared anyway. It must have been embarrassing for him.

"It's going to be a long night." noted Chef.

 _Meanwhile..._

Angela sat in her room, brushing her hair.

People at her school were comparing her to Butters.

She wondered why.

However, she noticed something alarming outside.

Two of Grand Wizard Cartman's soldiers were playing a game of kick the baby.

"Don't kick the baby!" exclaimed Ike.

"Kick the baby!" shouted the warrior.

Angela went outside her room and went to confront them.

"Hey! Quit kicking that baby!" shouted Angela.

"But it's fun! Besides, he's related to Kyle, the leader of the Drow Elves!" exclaimed the warrior.

They kept kicking Ike, even though he was just a baby.

On the other hand, he did have a football-shaped head.

Angela got angry at the soldiers.

Suddenly, she launched a fireball at them.

"What the-" exclaimed Angela.

The two soldiers were sent flying.

The two of them panicked and ran away.

"Thanks." said Ike.

"You're welcome. Who would want to kick such an adorable baby?" asked Angela.

"Beats me." answered the boy.

Ike handed Angela a letter.

Angela decided to read it.

"How would you like to join the Drow Elves? They could use help from someone like you." answered Ike.

"You look a lot like Samuel..." noted Angela.

"That's because we're both Canadian." stated Ike.

"Oh." answered the girl. "Does that mean you were adopted?"

Ike nodded.

"Alright then." nodded Angela.

She decided to follow Angela to the treehouse.

Ike gave Angela elf ears so she could pretend to be an elf.

Angela smiled and put them on.

"You seem to like using magic..." stated Ike.

"Yeah...I guess I feel kind of close to nature..." answered Angela.

"Would you like to be a druid?" asked the boy.

Angela nodded. That seemed like an ideal class for her. She could have gone with cleric but she figured maybe she would be more creative than that.

She picked up a staff and some robes.

Curious, she noticed Daniel was nearby.

She decided to talk to them.

 _Just for the record, this story takes place before Return Of Chef. That's why Chef is still alive. I have something slightly different planned for Chef though. He's not going to be joining the Super Adventure Club, in case you were wondering. Those guys were crazy._

 _I figured I would have Ike recruit Angela since as her name implies she is angelic. I figure that she would like children._

 _Fun fact: barbarians happen to have a danger sense, which of course is similar to Phoebe's ability. That's part of the reason why I figured Phoebe would be ideal for the class of a barbarian. Again, though they seem to be opposites at first glance, Kenny and Phoebe are a LOT alike._

 _Hopefully South Park can deal with this zombie pandemic. Fortunately, our heroes can use their roleplaying powers to fight them._

 _Let me know if you have any ideas._


End file.
